Today, I’m going to talk a bit about how you can actually improve your listening skills.
Our teachers and our parents were/are always telling us to pay attention. How do they know you’re not paying attention? It probably has a lot to do with your body language. Are you looking at something other than the speaker? Are slouched down with your arms crossed on your chest? Are you texting or playing a game on your phone? Are you blowing bubbles with your gum? If you answered yes, to any of the above questions – STOP!
Pay attention means to look at the speaker, appear interested, let go of the thoughts in your mind and listen to the words being said. You also need to watch the body language of the speaker. You must also stop thinking about how you’re going to respond while the person is still talking. When they stop talking paraphrase what they told you to make sure you understood the message. If you do these things you’ll be able to form a more accurate response.
So how does this help you in the listening situation I introduced last week? How about a scenario to illustrate?
A colleague and I recently had the opportunity to go out to dinner with the two individuals that would be providing us with some training. My colleague is one of those people who listen very well. One of the people we were out with expressed a desire to have a piece of real Key Lime pie. She was very emphatic about how it needed to be the real thing, not one of those green, out of the box imitations. The Key Lime pie ordered at the restaurant was a disappointment. Our training was ending the next day. My colleague makes a delicious Key Lime pie and considered making one for our trainer. However, she knew the trainer wouldn’t be able to travel with a pie. So instead of making the pie, she purchased a bottle of Key Lime Juice and presented it to the trainer. On the bottle of juice is an easy to follow recipe for real Key Lime Pie.
Most likely the trainer will remember my colleague’s name long after the rest of us at that training are forgotten.
Remember, you have two ears and one mouth for a reason. Pay attention to what people say, you’ll learn a lot more that way than you will by talking.
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